So it's been over a year since I came here.
I thought I'd update y'all about one wee thing:
I decided to quit booze completely and forever on Wednesday 16th May 2012 while chatting to my sister about recent drinking habits and my personal relationship with alcohol over the last year or two.
I thought I'd announce it here, because I want to get it off my chest and out in the open, but at the same time, I don't want to bombard close friends with all the ME ME ME ME - OH GOSH LET'S ALL TALK ABOUT MY BIG DRAMATIC DECISION SHALL WE? nonsense!
I know only a handful of people read this and they're people who care about this subject, so that's cool. My other friends and family can find out if and when they so desire to ask or bring up the subject.
So why?
It's clear to me that I can't moderate my alcohol intake very well.
I tried.
I failed.
I feel grateful that I'm lucky enough to be at a place right now where I can stop and look at the past and my drinking habits see that slippery slope for what it is!
I'm not really that "OUT OF CONTROL" right now. But by the time I get to the stage where it is out of control, I fear it'll be too late to stop the pattern / vicious cycle / bad habit etc...
Over the last 18 months or so, I tried to have a reasonable relationship with alcohol. My aim was to not go too overboard or spend too much time drunk / recovering from being drunk / or spend too much money on booze, but it's been the same 'slippery slope' every time:
Maybe I started drinking until I couldn't drink anymore, pretty much every Fri and Sat. The kind of social drinking that's extreme, but seen by many people as totally acceptable.
Then my weekends would become Fri, Sat & Sun. Then Fri, Sat, Sun and occasionally Mon.
Mostly drinking at home, alone. So that would mean recovering on Tuesday, but also feeling pretty rubbish on Wednesday too, Thursday would be a day to get things back in order, then Friday, it'd be time to party again.
And so on and so on...
With those 'recovery' days feeling worse and worse and those 'clearer' days not being so clear at all.
Then there's a couple of weeks of drinking every night. A binge fortnight. Telling myself, "I'm just going through a wee phase. I'm just taking a wee break from things for a couple of weeks" But after the 'wee phase' I find myself still drinking 4 nights a week.
Feeling a dark cloud slowly growing over my life, feeling slowly but surely that everything I'm doing is a waste of time. Feeling no real point to making the effort in many things. Working hard at some things, but the quality and commitment suffers....
No one else seems to notice, so maybe it's not that bad. No one close to me comments on it, so maybe I'm OK?
Or are they just afraid of bringing it up?
Eventually realising that I'm being far too apathetic about this issue: Looking back on the last few months, it's been a steady decline. And so, while I'm not totally out of control with it, right now, (I have still been working and creating music etc) I can see the decline and I know where it's heading to: A place where it gets harder and harder to turn back.
It's all such a cliche isn't it? But yea, that's because it's fucking true!
I've seen myself lose direction and I've felt hope fading away for me in the last few months and I'm sick of it. I'm sick of feeling useless and hopeless.
So this is definitely the right decision for me. I feel life's too short to waste anymore of it trying to wrestle with this issue, or lie to myself about how much control I have over it. No. I want to get on with living my life and doing some constructive and creative things.
The booze is only going to get in the way of that. It's one distraction I just don't need.
So that's that. Bye bye booze, we've had some great times, but you're too needy and I have wasted too much time dealing with your shit. All the best!
Friday, 25 May 2012
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Congratulations. I think it is a great decision to see what kind of an effect not drinking will have on your life. I did the same thing and now have been sober for 8 years. I am able to show up for my life now and I enjoy it thoroughly! I got help from New Life House - A Structured Sober Living. Check out their site if you are looking for help!
ReplyDeleteThanks for the encouragement and the link. I'll check it out now. I'm intrigued about the type of support that exists for people who have had problems with alcohol.
ReplyDelete4 months of the booze and counting...
I'm currently on day 4 of no alcohol and your drinking has described me down to a T... my weekends were getting longer and I've just came off a 10 day binge.
ReplyDeleteGood luck with not drinking and well done for getting this far.
Blessings to you! It aignt easy..but totally do-able. Remember, meeting makers make it, but Step-Takers Keep It! Sober Companion
ReplyDeleteRemember, getting sober is a choice made by winners. Let the light weights keep doing what they'll always be doing. African Mango Australia
ReplyDeletecongratulations! I've been sober since June 5, 2011 and it is the best decision I have ever made. I had been really crazy w/ alcohol on and off for years- but I, just like you, was tired of trying to moderate and justify. My life is so good now. I have a great AA home group that is tons of fun- still see good bands here and there. It's just amazing how much it has changed my life! It works!
ReplyDeleteIt'll be a year in 7 more days since you decided to quit drinking, Martin. How is it going? I fully understand what you tried to do because I was in the same position as you were. Unfortunately, I couldn't do it on my own and had to seek professional help to get the jump start I needed. Thanks for sharing your story. I wish you all the best!
ReplyDeleteDinah Gerdts
Sober living is fun. Being active in life. Doing your passion. Living healthy. Bonding with your family. :)
ReplyDeleteSober companion
Your article is very helpful thank you very much for sharing .
ReplyDelete